A Break From Tradition.

I’m breaking from tradition when I cycle across Canada. I intend this trip to take a handle bar bag. I had the thought a couple of years ago to use one of these and ordered one from the UK. But when it arrived, and I had had a chance to test it, I decided that if this was what cycle tourists had to put up with I didn’t want any part of it.

I’m not easily deterred though and have purchased another bag from a different outfit and am putting it through its paces for the next 6 weeks until we go.

Testing the New Handle Bar Bag.

The reason I need one of these is because my vintage kerosene cooker ‘Ken’ tends to fart and burp fumes to such an extent that I can’t possibly keep him inside my main bags. So whereas Gen Y probably keep their I phones , hair styler and sponsors pledges in their H/Bag I will be keeping my map, distance reader ,real money (saved myself) , and coffee making paraphanalia in mine.

For a short time when I was about 13yrs old I owned a H/Bar bag that had come as part of a set when I bought my touring bag combo. However before I had a chance to use it a school mate asked if he could borrow it for his tour and I never saw it again. He returned but my bag didn’t. Early lesson to ‘Niel the Wheel’ never to loan his cycle kit. He reckoned he had lost it. The H/Bar bag is suppose to hold your most valuable items, so how he could have lost it I don’t know. Later I heard that it had flown off the bars and he was too embarrassed to give me back what was left of it! It was a bit tricky to put on and Rex was a bit mechanically inept.

For those Born After 1980. A Map Reader Looks like this. (No You don't Need Batteries).

It is now the first day of May. Winter is officially here. It’s certainly not painting weather so work on the outside of the house has slowed. Slowed to a stop would describe it better. Cool evenings and rising electricity costs have prompted us to put an inbuilt gas heater into the South Wing. Since I can’t find a good spot for the Gas cylinder station I have decided to build a little shelter for them in the garden. A couple of bags of ready mix cement and some timber would do the job. As usual I thought one load with the BOB trailer would be sufficient. After purchasing it all at the hardware, and having got them to cut the timber to a manageable length I realised that the whole load would weigh close to 80kgs! The BOB trailer’s only rated to 35kgs. I figured it would handle 50kgs if I avoided all rough sections of road ( a tough ask in NZ ).  I ended up leaving 25kgs at store. The ride home with the rest was a ride I won’t want to repeat for some time. The trailer was difficult to control and it was rush hour on the roads.

Got Home Just on Dark.Can You See the Trailer Wheel?

Tomorrow I get to go back for the rest of it and build the cylinder shelter. What I really want to do is to get on line and register our Across Canada ride on the ‘Ride Across Canada’ website.

Time Between Trips.

Two days of rain in a row and I'm beginning to go out of my mind. Well maybe not quite but after spending the first day doing inside housework I am now getting a might bored. I have ascertained that I have enough coffee and chocolate to last another few days and luckily for me I have two cycling books that will keep me going. But I don’t want to read them too much in case I run out and the bad weather continues.

Adi has managed to get a week’s work so she is busy earning so that we can afford the two boxes of DT butted stainless spokes that I need to build our touring wheels up for Canada. Her toil will also cover the costs of such things as US visas and travel insurance. I mean that stuffs just boring. I'm looking forward to getting the spokes so that I can construct some retro wheels for her (to replace the ones that were nicked when her bike was stolen in Vietnam), and some ultra-retro ones for me. She'll be using a cassette freewheel arrangement but I'm opting for a screw on cluster type wheel system as I have some old Campag hubs and unused campag 36 hole rims I can use. The screw on cluster and chain for these wheels will be as cheap as chips to buy, and for the doubters out there I will cover myself by taking a spare freewheel body just in case.

I think after rummaging around in the bike shed I might have laid my hands on a 14-28 tooth (6speed)cluster that should get me over the Canadian Rockies (I don’t know for sure as I haven’t been there, but a 30 x 28t will have to do). Adi will get a 12-34 8sp cassette linked to a 22-32-46 chain wheel set.

 She's just spoilt.

Down Time.

The wet weather continues and in order to save my meager chocolate, coffee and reading materials I have decided to continue typing up my diary from the South American trip last year. (This should keep me occupied and reduce the number of daily coffee breaks).  I’ve been a bit slack at this. After every cycle tour we type the diary and then print it off with our photos. The whole lot goes into a photo album. The Vietnam trip has been done because Adi had input into it. She can also type with two hands at once making the process a whole lot quicker for her.

But I soldier on. The trouble is when one finger typing you tend to get RSI quicker. A break with coffee and chocolate. That’s the answer.

There's a break in the weather this morning and the sun is actually shinning. As the reluctant cyclist I have not quite managed to get out early enough to enjoy the sun. But I have managed to cycle  50kms of my proposed circuit on sealed roads dry. I find myself then as the weather once again turns wet with the option of carrying on into the hills and onto the forestry roads that will eventually lead me home or to turn around and ride back the way I have come. The road out was full of truckers, so I think my decision to ride into the hills along forestry roads in the rain quite an easy one to make. Things were going swimmingly when my gravel road was rudely interrupted by a sign saying "Road Closed, Cyclists Use Dun Mountain Cycle way". Now I have been trapped here before. What the sign fails to explain is that the Dun Mountain Cycle way is actually better described as the 'Dun Mountain, Mountain Bike Way'. Since I had between my legs a machine that definitely didn’t have 100mm of travel or 2 1/2" tyres I gave the sign the proverbial fingers and continued down the road.  I got at least 5km further on before the nice road construction man pointed me to a goat track on the right of the road. I was advised that that was my best bet now, if I wanted to see Nelson and my bed that night. I have to say I wasn’t especially impressed since in addition to not having the previously mentioned mtb attributes, my equipment also didn’t include gearing that you could climb lampposts with or shoes you could walk in.

I did have on board though a vintage primus and half a packet of biscuits. (Chocolate Chip even).

I may have finally got home after dark but I didn’t miss my afternoon tea.

Keep Left so the Sheep can Overtake?

I'm satisfied now that I  haven’t wasted the entire week around home. I can say that I’ve done a decent ride and finished the South American trips type up. This time last year I had just made it to the East Coast of Brazil, and if my memory serves me correctly I spent that evening riding to camp in the pitch dark as well.

 Sometimes there just aren’t enough hours in the day.

 

 

Summers Over.

That’s it. Easter marks the end of summer for most Kiwis. Those not fortunate enough to be heading for the northern hemisphere have to now endure winter with temperatures down to 3 or 4 degrees centigrade overnight and with the cruel sight of an early morning frost upon awakening. Those New Zealanders silly enough not to have been riding their bicycles for the last year and thus spending absorbent amounts on petrol , now must put up with daylight hours reduced to 11 and be forced to listen to politicians bickering about how to squeeze another tax dollar out of those that still have a job to go too.

Easter also marks the end of the cycling year for ‘Niel the wheel’ who has been a good boy and clocked up 20,000 kms. In my mind this has saved me about 2000ltrs of petrol and at over $2 a litre that’s over $4000 dollars! If I add on other sundry motoring costs saved such as registration and tyre black (a clean machine is a happy machine), then I have saved enough for a return trip for two to Canada! I have decided that since Adi is such a good sport and since I missed her quite a bit when cycling overseas last year that she can come too. I will however make her promise that she will like it a lot more than she liked our recent trip to Vietnam. And getting her bike and all her gear nicked near Cambodia was just jolly bad luck. The tickets are all paid for and will be arriving in the box next week according to Di our travel Agent.

The bike shop seems happy to get rid of me for a few months to enable us to cycle from Vancouver to Halifax. As usual I have left Adi (my intrepid travel buddy) to plan the course since she can only then blame herself when things get a bit grippy as they inevitably do on a mission like this. I have great respect for Adi’s suffering ability though. Over the years I have witnessed Adi suffering on bike tours all over the world and she always comes through in the end and completes the mission. Adi knows that when she lands on foreign soil with me, and the wheels are slotted into the frames at the airport, there are no free rides until we hit the other side. ‘Niel the wheel’ and travel mates don’t get to jump on a bus here or a train there when things don’t go our way. Vehicle support is for sisseys.

And a Warm Welcome to our New Team Member.

This trip will be tight though with very limited wiggle room and a bare minimum of days off. I promised my boss’s at the bike shop that I would not leave until they got back from their mountain bike adventures in Whistler, Canada and we have to be back so that Adi’s bosses can go to the annual 4 Square conference. Please don’t ask what people do at a 4 Square supermarket conference because I have no idea. But I bet they have a good time on all that free drink and food. It certainly can’t be any worse than the local government conferences I used to be roped into where the highlight used to be a trip to the local oxidation pond or discussion on the best sort of composting toilet. I remember leaving full time work behind me and helping out at a Specialised bike shop and dreading an upcoming conference that I had been nominated for. Only to get there and after only a couple of hours talking about biking to be given a new model and being told for the rest of the day we’d be riding! I felt sure I’d have to pay for this on day two, but no, 2 hours of cycle chit chat and then we hit the road. At the end of it all I even got a framed certificate. Now proudly on display in the bike shed/ workshop.

Anyway I digress, normally you would build into a cycle touring schedule a day off every 5 days or so, but due to time constants at each end we will need to keep on schedule and the process will need to run like clockwork. It’s about 7500kms from one side of Canada  to the other and all going well I will pop out on the east coast with my travel buddy , albeit a bit slimmer , still at my side.

'Hoover it up Henry'

Really all we have to do is ride a consistent 140km every day while carrying our gear and camping as we go. In order to achieve this we have been regularly going out over the summer completing 120km rides. The cycle touring budget this year has been further stretched with an addition to our family at Potters-End.  3 leg Bob and Chicken Woo have now been joined by Henry. Henry was living under the house and doing a pretty good job at keeping all the meatier insects at bay until Adi discovered him and thought he might prefer life topside, or more specifically in my bedroom rather than under it. It hasn’t taken Henry long to settle in. Now though the cycling budget must stretch to housing not just ‘3 Leg Bob’ while we are away but also ‘Hoover it up Henry’. We are going to have to do a deal with the cattery or cat resort, as at $12.50 per day each, they are going to live better than us and we will need to mortgage the house to retrieve them on our return. I suggested to Adi that if we freedom camped and lived under bridges on our way across Canada, that would help pay for the boys to have their 3 star accommodation. I think she thought I was joking.

Luckily my Mercian is now always ready to embark on an overseas trip and I have rebuilt a replica of the bike that Adi lost in Southeast Asia. So there is nothing I really need to buy for the ride across except the usual consumables such as chains, clusters and tyres. I’m going to try to do the whole 7500kms on one set of touring tyres although I know that Adi will need a spare set as she will once again use 23c tyres in the interests of speed, and the lower resistance that comes with the skinny’s. The skinny tyres on Adi’s bike were a pain in the arse in Vietnam where I couldn’t get replacement tubes and the roads at times were muddy and pot holed. But I have to admit that on Canadian roads they make perfect sense. I’d be using them myself except that I have a new pair of heavy touring plus tyres in the bike shed just hanging there and I figure that by using them I free up my spare time to fix all Adi’s punctures.

I Fire up 'Ken' as the Tapawera 4 Square Staff Look On.

I have now mastered the finer points of my Dads Kerosene primus and have had it burning red hot on a number of day rides. I’m still not sure whether one of these could actually blow up but I am happy that it will cook us dinner even in a Saskatchewan gale. And besides I will be some distance away in the tent patching Adi’s spare tubes while she slaves over ‘Ken’ the primus.

 

Cycle Tour 2013.

Its all confirmed.

 It looks like this year I will be cycling across Canada. I haven't got time to talk about it now but yesterday Adi and I booked our tickets with Di (our friend and travel agent) and today I cleared it with work. I suppose you could call it a work sabbatical.

I've also been out and about doing the odd bit of training for it.

Anyone interested in cycling across Canada might like to follow my blog. We'll be going right across from Vancouver to the coast on the other side. Nova Scotia is it? We'll head Eastwards anyway until we hit salt water.

Andy has been a good sort and has gone out on the odd mini tour with me. I wont be using a BOB trailer for the Canada trip.

Anyway must dash but will fill in the details in the next few days.

I’m sitting here on my favourite couch. The chicken’s been fed and the neighbour’s cat has had his three spoonfuls of tender roo meat (the neighbours are away in Aussie, possibly picking up some more roo meat for Chase). Adi’s at work earning money so that I can live the life I have become accustomed to. What I am not doing and had planned to do yesterday is riding my bike over the Tadmor Saddle, after which I was supposed to test my old primus cooker that I have made alterations to. Once again as the reluctant cyclist, I have had trouble getting out of the door. The weather is superb and I have decided that the Tadmor Saddle will have to wait until tomorrow. The weather will of course be just as nice. As a reluctant cyclist I soon learnt when we shifted to Nelson 20years ago that I couldn’t often use the weather as an excuse for not cycling. 

Adi assures me that tomorrow she will hold my hand as I mount my bike and point me in the right direction even accompanying me down the driveway. She will head to work again and I will pedal south to test my kerosene primus.  Adi will employ this technique later in the year when she will no doubt get me out of bed in time to catch the plane to Vancouver. This is a necessary starting point I understand for a cycle ride across Canada. But before then I must sort out a few things regarding my camping kit. My Dads 70 year old cooker is my first priority after I lost my 30 year old Optimus cooker last year in Vietnam.  Last week I made a wind break for it out of an old cheese grater. This was a feat that quite honestly I think would be way beyond the abilities of today’s generation but came to me in a flash. I pride myself also in making an unused cheese grater fit when I could have more easily used Adi’s favourite grater. Once I’d got the whole thing together and had performed a test burn I realised that the old cheese grater I had used was also once owned by Dad. (My father scratched the date into everything he ever bought. Yes, apparently even a cheese grater). I also pride myself on searching the eBay site and finding all the spare parts I will need for the old primus, something the current generation could do if they only knew what to use the parts procured for.

'Ken' Ready for a Test Burn in the Wilds.

While cycling over the Takaka Hill the other day with a couple of friends on roadie bikes my kerosene cooker was never far from my thoughts. While my mates were concerned with their gear ratios and last fastest time I was thinking more about how the smell of kerosene from my cooker would permeate everything I own while touring unless I had a dedicated cooker and cooking stuff pannier / bag. While my mates discussed the demise of Lance and compared our individual weights I couldn’t help thinking that my parents probably poisoned me as a kid by running the kerosene heater constantly inside, and encouraged me to stand over it, breathing in the warm gases during periods of cold weather.

My parents weren’t the only ones responsible for trying to lower my IQ during my developing years. The motor traders association (MTA) were busy promoting the virtues of driving cars everywhere while polluting the roadsides with automotive lead additives. Unlike today’s kids I was expected to not only do well at school but also to get myself there and back under my own steam. This necessitated riding my bike while trying to avoid not only child molesters but also the older generation who seemed intent on running me down with their Morris Minors or Triumph Heralds. That’s if they couldn’t poison me with their exhaust fumes first.  My parents can rest in peace but I think cyclists of the 70’s should take a class action against the MTA.

When the Chips are Down  Some Bikes Just Don't Pass Muster.

While dreaming about all this, things had taken a turn for the worse for my mates who on this stinking hot day were discovering that the tarry loose chips on the road were sticking between the tyres and forks/ seat stays of their tight clearance frames. While their Cervelo’s and Colnago’s made expensive grinding noises my Mercian (complete with mudguards) purred on regardless. Once the reluctant cyclist is on his bike turning back is not an option. Their decision to turn back and high tail it back down the hill was understandable given that their equipment was clearly out of its depth. I advised them to nurse their racing machines carefully down the hill as one chip too many could result in utter carnage and continued on the Mercian to the top. Hopefully the squealing sound being made by their bikes masked my uncontrolled mirth as I disappeared towards the top.

 

2013 & My Birthday.

Adi suggested that as my birthday was coming up and since she had lost my beloved Optimus  camping stove, that I should get a new one as a present from her. I have to say that two thoughts immediately fizzed through my brain at this suggestion. The first was one of excitement at being given the permission to go hunting for cycle camping gizmos (what a dear). The second was a nagging thought that somehow this didn’t add up, the thought that there was something a little bit whiffy about the idea. Maybe I was being short changed here. After all she had lost the stove in Vietnam when her bicycle and all her worldly goods had been nicked, ( my stove I had had for 25yrs. A stove I had been given as a present. This is a stove that had singed my eyebrows on more than one occasion). Surely she should have to replace my stove with her insurance money and then buy me another present. I was being carefully done out of a legitimate birthday present!

My Latest Trademe Purchase. (Just an aside)

It’s that same feeling you used to get when your older brother or sister told you to do things you didn’t want to do, for your own good. Off they go blabbing to your mum or Dad about things, for your own good. Now you realise that they often had a secret agenda but at the time you didn’t know how to put it into words. It just smelt bad and it ended up getting you into trouble or costing you your privileges. Later on I got pretty good at spotting this sort of thing. I had to learn how to out manipulate the manipulators or I would never get a new matchbox toy again or be allowed to go on over-night bike rides with my friends.

Overnight Camping with Friends on my Birthday.

Anyway once again I digress. I got around the stove thing by deciding in my own head that the antique kerosene camping stove that my Dad gave me many years ago, along with a kerosene paint stripper, would work for all my camping needs. After all dad had been using it since 1938 and still had a good head of hair so it must be reasonably safe. In addition to that I had as a teenager witnessed the operation of the kerosene burner when Dad torched my motorbike spark plugs free of all oil residues (I was told to stand back as the thing flamed into life belching sooty smoke, hissing and spitting. Blue fierce flames slowly replacing the random and uncontrollable yellow flares)

Dads no longer around to run me through a reviser on how to start the camping stove so I will assume that the principle is much the same as the kerosene torch  taking the added precaution of asking Adi to do it while I do what Dad told me to do. Stand back.

Help Dad! "She's going to blow and take out the corn field".

"It's Ok, Stand Down. She's Happy Now"

So that brought me back to the gift problem. Adi once again proved her worth by coming up with two other great suggestions. The first option was a bicycle bell. And the second was a world globe.

I know what you are thinking. Go the globe. Heaps better than just a bike bell. But this would not be just any bell. I’ve had your ubiquitous ‘I love My Bike Bells’. In fact I’ve had dozens of them. I’ve had so many I can tell you they’re average life expectancy before;

1.       Fading to a point where you can’t read the trendy ‘I love My Bike’ sticker.

2.       The striker constantly clanging uncontrollably on the shell when riding on rough roads (most places in NZ)

3.       Plastic internal lever ratchet shredding themselves.

 

No my bike bell would come from the Glasgow Bicycle Bell Company. This bell would be quality. Made from the best British steel and hand brazed by artisans.

In the end I got the World Globe. The decision was inevitable. After checking the globe site and viewing so many variations that my vision was becoming blurred I discovered that Nova Rico Globes are made in Italy. Game, set and match. I am a sucker for all things Italian.

My globe was available through the NZ importer and when it arrived had nobly bits on it so I can visualise the big hills I have made Adi cycle up, and a few bigger ones that I have suffered on my own. I have to say now that I have my globe that, I’m a bit disappointed with some countries that I have cycled across. For instance the USA is pretty small when you look at it on the globe. Australia and South America on the other hand I’m happy to report are impressive. We won’t even mention Europe, it’s just tiny. And  all the time I’ve wasted cycling around there! I’ve definitely lost brownie points cycling in Europe and the US.



The Nova Rico Iluminator. (Made in Florence!)



So I’m going to put that right this year by cycling across Canada from Vancouver to the big wet on the other side.

Adi is doing her best to encourage me. She’s a dynamo when it comes to planning and budgeting for overseas cycle adventures.. Not only has she got me this globe but she insists on accompanying me across Canada to be sure that I make it to the other side well nourished. She has even suggested that following this she will get on the cosy plane seat home, but that I should cycle back!

Hmm it doesn’t look that far.

And India doesn’t look all  that big.

Hand Made in Appleby.

I pretty much forgot that Xmas was fast approaching and having only enough time to get myself a present I had to advise Adi that it might be best in the interests of saving time that she rush out and get herself something.

Just in the nick of time we managed to wrap them up and put them on the mantel piece. Talk about stress! I don’t think that Adi would have wrapped hers unless I insisted. After all you’ve got to do things correctly don’t you? As for sending cards to friends and others… sorry couldn’t get that motivated about it. I know that will be me removed from your next year’s Xmas card list but I’ll just have to take that like a man.

I had only enough time to send one card and that was to my mother. A bit silly really because she has forgotten much of the last 92years including me. My sister tells me that she is a favourite among the rest home staff. I fear this is only because she sleeps most of the time and when not in deep slumber she steers into space with a smile on her face. I always used to be a smiley, uncomplaining baby and I expect I will also exhibit the same traits when I’m in a rest home.  I will get a rest home report saying that” Niel is a very well-mannered and conscientious member of the residents”. And they will be happy to keep me on as I pay well and cause no disturbances.

Adi and I cycled to a Xmas Eve movie, The Hobbit of course. Adi just can’t get enough of dwarfs and orcs. I somehow think that the whole thing could be somewhat improved with the addition of a legion or two of warrior elf maidens. I don’t particularly mind whose side their on as long as they fight hard and ruthlessly.

Come Christmas day I felt that I still had time to make myself another present or two so after opening our presents and entertaining Karen and Terry for morning tea in the summer room I set too constructing a couple of carbon neutral bike racks in the back garden. I suppose they’re not quite carbon neutral as I used an electric skil saw to make them and they can’t really I suppose be described as organic as they are treated in enough chromium , arsenic and copper to kill fungus for the next 2000years. But they are jolly good at holding my bike up!

 

And Bits Left Over For a Single!

What did Father Xmas get me for Christmas you all ask??? He got me, besides the pest proof bike rack kit, a Campagnolo brake set!!!! (With cable kit). I have no intention at this stage of putting it on the Mercian as I already have an XTR v brake set which I love and has stopped me from going over the edge in many exotic countries.(Santa what were you thinking??) But when it finally dies I will have a Campag cyclocross brake set to replace it with. And until that time (probably around 2025) it can live in the workshop with all the other spare parts that bear the magic inscription ‘Made in Italy’ and are of no real use at the moment.

And once Adi had got the wrapping off her present… low and behold it was a bag. But not any bag in my book. No it was a Vespa luggage bag which was bought by Santa to obviously encourage Adi and I to set out on another Vespa / Mercian adventure. Adi feels certain that although Santa didn’t tell her specifically where we are expected to Vespa / cycle, it must be across Canada next year and I’m not about to disagree.

So once all that excitement was over the day was almost dusted. Just enough time to whip over to the neighbours orchard to nick some berries for the Pavlova and down another rum and coke.

It was supposed to rain this week but those are promises that refuse to come to fruition at the moment and so once again I will have to tweak the neighbouring orchards irrigation system so that it delivers us a bit of the clear stuff as well.

Cant thank Santa for that one.